When it comes to maintaining emotional balance in our work place we are dealing with two different levels; external factors and internal factors.
Some aspects of our actual work environment may be stressful for us, maybe there is not enough light in the room we work in, possibly there is no air and we find it stuffy or maybe the air conditioning unit is straight over our head.
These external aspects of our environment are sometimes ones that we cannot do anything about and yet, they cause us great upset or anxiety. Of course maybe they are linked with our need to ask for what we need in life and, sometimes these needs are basic!!!
However our internal factors are those that come from within ourselves. Our past stories, our belief systems and our emotional baggage and triggers. These we can control!
Certain types of people are triggered by other types of people! For example if you are a person who is obsessed with a neat and tidy environment and you find yourself sharing a desk with someone who is a hard working but a rather messy person, then this can cause you stress. An untidy desk can have a more negative impact on some people than others. It's an energy trigger for some .. everything is energy!
Maybe your boss has the same type of personality as your husband/wife, your father/mother or a figure in authority that you have not had a good relationship with in the past. Possibly he or she represents to you, someone who is over controlling to you and every time they ask you to do something you feel triggered by them. You might not even know this is the case of your feelings!
Someone else in the same office may not have these beliefs and feelings about a male or female in a controlling relationship so will not be triggered in the same way by the boss.
We have of course, always got a choice to how we react.
Becoming aware of what triggers us is probably a good starting point into awareness and then, should we want to, we can learn ways to change our beliefs so that similar patterns are not being triggered.
This may be, for example, learning how to stand up for ourselves in the face of a controlling person or a perceived controlling person.
I ask clients to ask themselves "What is the best that could happen if you do that ..."
It is a turnaround of "What is the worst that can happen ..."
It is much better to be in a vibration of what we want rather than what we don't want!
So for example "What would be the best thing that could happen if you actually had the courage to speak up for yourself to your boss?".
Believe me I have been here, it ain't easy but, when you do gather the courage to speak your mind it is such an empowering moment. Most often, but of course not always, the other person will simply realise what you are saying; they may be not aware they were speaking to you in such a controlling manner. Maybe you were provoking them i.e. maybe you were holding up a mirror to them that is triggering them!
Remember we never know anyone else's story.
Another great tip is becoming mindful of our fundamental characteristics, talents and strengths and, this can be like uncovering a treasure box.
When we come from this place we are in flow, the push and pull dissolves and finally things work out!! That's for another blog post though!
AND as always until next time .. keep the faith