How to Say "No" Gracefully

Yesterday I wrote a blog entitled "Saying No with Assertiveness" inspired by an article that spoke about "no" being the new "yes". 

If you are really struggling with being drained by others and don't know how to get off the hamster wheel here are my 4 tips to saying no gracefully and putting an end to this cycle.  

1      Imagine yourself standing as a bystander when someone asks you to do something that is draining you.  Something that takes your time and at this stage you feel obliged to do it.   See yourself standing in front of this person when they ask you to do whatever it is they want from you.  You have a smile on your face. 

2     Imagine seeing yourself say something like "You know I am really, really busy today and although I really want to help you, it may be tomorrow or the day after when I get around to it".   Imagine you are smiling as you say this to the person in front of you.   

3   Gauge the way you feel as you speak these words.   Does it make you break out in a sweat?   Do you feel good that you have actually stood up for yourself?    You may need to practice several times until you feel empowered in saying what it is you are saying!    

4 Practice this exercise anytime you want to put distance between what you are doing out of a feeling of "having to" rather than a place of where you want to.   Sometimes when we do things that we feel we have to do, we may actually want to help the person but, we are not doing it on OUR terms e.g. when we have the time to do it.  

Saying no in an assertive way is an act of self-love.   

For more on becoming the empowered being you are entitled to be you can visit my website at

Dolores Andrew-Gavin, Founder IrishHealthHour, Founder Global Emotional Health Summit, Author, Soul Care Practitioner, Energy Therapist and Mum


Dolores Andrew-Gavin